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01-03
So, em, quite right, quite right. So welcome up please Jim
and Harry.
[Applause.]
[Melodion and bodhran. Three sets.]
[Applause.]
04
They asked for that. They did, it's taken some hunting down
but I eventually found and strangely enough it was in the
Bruce Arms hotel, fancy that just where I was last night.
Leave it there for the next one?
Did I tell you all I was sober last night,
I did didn't I. I obviously lied. Because I distinctly remember
taking it outside and putting it into the car. Not my car,
not my car.
Right what are we going to do. We're going to do a tune called
'The Repeal of the Poll Tax' and follow it up by another one.
[Flute and bodhran.]
[Applause.]
05
I've left my beer over there again. [Laughs.] I thought my
memory was failin us.... I don't think my memory's what it
used to be honest. Possibly yes, I don't think my memory is
what it used to be. I'll do the Bonnie Gateshead Lass, no,
no I'll rephrase that, I'll do a song from where I come from
called the Bonnie Gateshead Lass, if I can remember all the
words.
I warrant ye've never seen me lass her name
I cannot mention
For fear ye'll gang and tell er that I love er though I dee
But just for lads and lassies for to whisper their affections
The bonniest lass in Gateshead's bonny face is botherin me,
The bonniest lass in Gateshead's bonny face is botherin me.
Well the first time I saw her I thought I didna
know
I thought I seen her face before, but I couldna think o where
Blue eyes like mine in passin up the high street in the mornin
When her look was so entrancin that me heart was mine nae
mair,
Her look was so entrancing that me heart was mine nae mair.
When I didna see her for a while and one night
at the bridge end
I stepped on er gown and the gathers they come away
She telt us I was clumsy and I said wey, sorry
I humbly begged er pardon I was licked for what to say,
I humbly begged er pardon I was licked for what to say.
Well I walked on doon by her side just as if
I had the right tae dae
The conversation at first was shy but then it turned first
class
We talked aboot the weather and she telt us her father was
A peddler down in Hawks o my bonny Gateshead lass,
A peddler down in Hawks o my bonny Gateshead lass.
She telt us confidentially that her mother was
a grocer
And her brother's father's cousin was a fiddler on the shore
She smiled so sweet and pleasant and she spoke so sweet and
nicely
I vowed I'd never seen a lass so charmin the like before,
I vowed I'd never seen a lass so charmin the like before.
Why I made her laugh and slap me lug wi talkin
lots o nonsense
But bless ye when yer courtin wey, there's nowt so good'll
pass
I asked if she'd be ma lass, I'd take her out on Sunday
To my delight, she said I might, me bonny Gateshead lass,
To my delight, she said I might, me bonny Gateshead lass.
I did all that, I'm amazed!
[Applause.]
I'm going to do what I did last night, but I
can't remember how it went.
[Audience laughing with musicians.]
06
[Flute and bodhran. Applause.]
07
And now, when Peter remembers what he actually took out to
his car that he thought was his flute, we'll get him back
up to tell us and do another couple of tunes. Now I think
we'll have a fine singer up, and your own, your very own,
Jock Pratt. Thank you.
[Applause.]
08
[JP] I'll start wi an aul favourite ye'll have heard umpteen
times afore, but it's got a good chorus and ye can a jine
in, and it doesn't stop it being a good song just because
it's been sung a lot.
I gied intae Turra mairket, a the mairket for
tae fee
I met in wi a wealthy fairmer, the barnyards o Delgety.
Linten addie,…
He promised me the twa best horses, that iver
gaed in iron sheen
Fan I gied hame tae the barnyards, there wis nithin there
bit skin and been.
Linten addie,…
The auld grey meer sat on her hunkers, the auld
dun horse lay in the grime
For a' that I could hup and cry they wouldna rise at yokin
time.
Linten addie,…
Noo Jean MacPherson maks me brose, and it's
wi her I cannae gree
First a knot an syne a mot an aye the tither jilp o bree.
Linten addie,…
Noo Jean MacPherson maks ma bed, ye'll see the
marks upon ma shins,
For Jean the coorse ill-trickit jaud his filled ma bed wi
prickly whins.
Linten addie,…
Fan I gang tae the kirk on Sunday, monies the
bonny lass I see,
Fen sittin at their faither's side and winkin ower the pews
at me.
Linten addie,…
Noo some can drink and nae be drunk, and ithers
fecht and nae be slain,
But I can court anither man's lass and aye be welcome tae
my ain.
Linten addie,…
The caunle it has burned oot, the snotter's
fairly on the wane,
So fair ye well ye barnyards, ye'll never catch me here again.
Linten addie,…
[Applause.]
09
Aul Flossie she lay sleepin wi her nose upon her pa,
Fan something started biting her and she began tae cla,
Well she scrapit wi her hind leg, and she scrapit unco weel,
Fan a fell out a muckle flech, and landed on the steel.
Weel steel, it wisnae a warm place, in the middle
o the nicht,
So flech it didnae hesitate and it began tae shift,
Well it lowpit tae the airmchair, and it raised it's sleekit
head,
An in the corner o the room it spied the maister's bed.
Weel aul Jock lay sleepin [snores] his mou wis
gapin wide,
The flech it lowpit on his chin and hid a glower inside,
Na, na he said and lowpit aff, at's nae the place for me,
So it creepit doon anaith his claes, it landed on his knee.
Oh aul Jock he wisna a modern chiel, for he
sleepit in his sark,
An the skin aroon his kneecap wis as teuch as ony bark,
But the flech remained undaunted and gied a richt guid nip,
Quite satisfied with fit it got it shifted til his hip.
Anither bite and jumped again, it landed on
his fit,
It crawled up till his instep and started biting it,
The peer aul man had kittly feeta nd he began to lauch,
The dog it barked, the wife sat up rail fleg't in the dark.
Dear Lord, Dear Lord preserve us Jock, have
ye tint yer wit,
But the mannie couldnae answer her, and tried tae claw his
fit,
Noo fit happened next I'll tell ye, perhaps ye've maybe guessed,
But the flech gid creepin up his sark and landed on his vest.
Ach, crack a spunk and licht a lump, the guid
wife roars tae Jock,
She rummeled ower the heid o him and sine put on a frock,
Calm yersel, and tell me man, noo I've got o'er ma fricht,
Fit kind o cairy on de ye think ye'r huddin in the middle
o the nicht.
But Jock he couldnae answer her, all he could
dae wis pech,
Oh woman I may be wrang, I think it wis a flech,
A flech she roared, ach tik aff yer sark and let me hae a
look,
Well he did what he was bidden but his han' kinda shook.
But a this fuss and bother jist proved ower
muckle for the bug,
So it lowpit fae the semmit and it bit the wifie's lug,
But now, by jings ma pen's gone dry, but ah'll gie ye a bet,
Far dae ye think it lowpit last, ha, nae far you think either,
It gied back tae Flossie's neck.
[Applause.]
10
Right, anither aul favourite to finish wi. There's nae chorus
this time like, never mind.
Fan I wis only ten year auld I left the village
skweel,
Ma faither fee'd me tae the Mains to chaw his milk and meal.
I first put on ma nairra breeks ti hap ma spinnle trams,
Aye and bucklet roon ma knappin knees a pair o Nicky Tams.
Weel, first I gaed on for baillie loon an' syne
I gaed on for third.
An then of course I had to get the horseman's grip and word.
A loaf o' breid to be ma piece, and a bottle for drinking
drams
Oh ye niver ging through the cauf-hoose door withoot yer Nicky
Tams.
Oh the fairmer I am wi' ayenoo, he's wealthy
but he's mean,
Tho' corn is chep his horse are thin, his harnesss fairly
deen.
He gars us foo oor cairts ower fu, his conscience kens nae
qualms,
But fan breist-straps brak, there's naething like a pair o'
Nicky Tams.
Oh I'm coortin bonnie Annie noo, Rob Tamson's
kitchie deem,
Though she is five-an-forty and I'm but saiventeen.
She clorts a muckle piece to me wi different kinds o jam,
An tells me ilkae nicht that she admires ma Nicky Tams.
Noo ae Sunday I git rigged oot the kirkie for
to gang,
Ma collar it wis unco ticht ma [tape change].
a bobbie on the Force,
Or maybe I'll get on the trams tae ca a pair o horse,
But fitever it's ma luck to be, the bobbies or on the trams,
I'll never forget the happy days I wore ma Nicky Tams.
[Applause.]
11
Thanks John, we're drawing towards. Your flute? You've not
lost it again. The penultimate turn of the evening, is Susie
Allen, now I would take a guess that unless she's got it very
cleverly hidden about her person she's not going to be playing
the harp this evening. Are you? No, she's not. So she could
well be singing to you. So a warm welcome to Susie Allen.
12
I'll just sing two fairly short songs, and then I'll get home.
I'll start off singing Strathmartin Braes, a Dundee song.
As I come ower Strathmartin Braes, wha dae ye
think I seen,
A braw young piping laddie coming linkin ower the green.
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day
Now he's taen up his chanter and sik a spring
he's played,
That I chose love and freedom now we wander all wir days.
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day.
He played a jig, an he played a reel, played
a sweet strathspey,
He roosed ma hert till it's beat ticked time wi the tappin
o ma tae.
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day.
There's gowd in the broom on the Sidlaw hills,
honey fae the heather sweet,
There's a speckled trout in the dirlin tarn, a carpet neath
wir feet.
Singin hey donal, ho donal, durram a doo a day.
Now I've nae gaud tae offer ye, I've gaithered
little gear,
But we'll hae love and freedom gin ye'll go wi me my dear.
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day.
Sine he's taen up his chanter and sik a spring
he's played,
That I chose love and freedom, now we wander all wir days.
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day,
Singin hey Donal, ho Donal, dirrum a doo a day.
[Applause.]
13
I'll just sing one more song and it's a song that I haven't
heard much or sung often, but a bonnie traditional song.'
Oh it happened on a day in the merry month of
May,
I gaed oot tae see ma bonny lad, he promised to come my way,
I gaed oot tae see ma bonny lad, he promised to come my way,
But my bonny laddie's never yet come by me.
Oh what hae I said, love, or what hae I done?
Or what objections tae me hae ye found?
Or hae ye found anither, that's dancin in ma sheen?
Is that the reason laddie ye gang by me?
Oh nithin hae ye said, lass, nor nithin hae
ye din;
And nae objections tae ye hae I found,
But I hae gane a coortin anither pretty maid,
And that's the reason lassie I gang by ye.
Oh ye micht a coorted six, or ye micht coorted
seven,
Oh ye micht a coorted, eight, nine, ten or eleven,
Sure ye micht a coorted dizens, a' ower and ower again,
But be kinder tae yer auld love for all that.
Oh the hills they are high and the leaves they
are green,
And many is the happy nicht ma love and I hae seen,
But noo anither lassie is dancin in my sheen,
And say lately bonny laddie ye gang by me.
Oh the hills they are high but the leaves are
nae rotten,
Although ma lad is left me, I'm no hertbroken,
For I'll get anither lad, and you'll soon be forgotten,
And then sae neatly bonny laddie I'll gang by you.
[Applause.]
14
Right there was somebody who had arrived late tonight, with
some weak excuse. So we're going to ask him to come up and
finish you off. [Explains why he's late.] I'm hoping he will,
I'm hoping he has a note. Yes Dan, it's time for you to come
and finish everybody off. Rumour has it that you might have
some assistance as well. (Aye, Ian's coming up here). Very
good, a big round of applause for the latecomer, it's Don
Maclellan.
15
Want to know why I was late? No.
Car broke down again?
I'll tell you it was quite good, out of the
bad comes the good. I've now got a Scorpio 4x4, which I'll
just leave the car by the side of the road. OK, there's not
too many left, but let's try and give Tom something to records.
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all the plumbers
and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
That's the chorus.
Come on try it.
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all
the plumbers and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
You got it?
It's a long time, John forgot, when the public
loo was a penny in the slot
Ten pence now that price goes for a wee or to sit and powder
your nose
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all the plumbers
and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
When Anne saw the door was open wide, she wasted
no time, she nipped in side
Teuched[?] as could be, she did her best, cause it was free
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all the plumbers
and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
Well they called for a plumber and a joiner
too, the plumber he plumbed while the joiner screwed
They pushed pusher, she gave a gasp as the water came up around
her knees
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all the plumbers
and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
Well a great crowd gathered as they carried
her by, her face on the stretcher and her arse tae the sky
I've never seen the likes, one woman exclaimed, I've seen
her husband but it's never been framed
How they tittered, how they chaffed, how all the plumbers
and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
Aye, how they tittered, how they chaffed, how
all the plumbers and the joiners laughed
When they saw the young girl jammed like a plug in the seat
of a lavatory pan.
I knew it was bad news getting Ian up here,
he missed the best verse.
16
Oh when I die, bury me low
where I can hear the bonny Tweed flow
A sweeter place I never did know, and the rolling hills of
the Borders
Now I have travelled far and wide, I have seen
the Hudson and the Clyde
And have courted by Loch Lomondside but I dearly love the
Borders
When I die, bury me low where I can hear the bonny Tweed flow
A sweeter place I never did know, and the rolling hills of
the Borders
Well it's well that I can mine the day, with
my lass as they strolled by the Tay
But all that beauty fades away among the hills of the Borders.
When I die, bury me low where I can hear the bonny Tweed flow
A sweeter place I never did know, and the rolling hills of
the Borders
Aye, it's there you'll have a piece of mind,
bonny lassies there you'll find
And the men are hard and yet so kind among the hills o the
Borders
When I die, bury me low where I can hear the bonny Tweed flow
A sweeter place I never did know, and the rolling hills of
the Borders
Aye, when I die, bury me low where I can hear
the bonny Tweed flow
A sweeter place I never did know, and the rolling hills of
the Borders
The rolling hills of the Borders.
[Applause.]
17
You feeling better now? He's awfully nervous now, he's never
done this before. Never been on last before. Never been asked
to be on last before. Sing up then, eh? Please.
O the summer time is comin an the trees are
sweetly bloomin,
An the wild mountain thyme blooms around the purple heather,
Will ye go, lassie, go, and we'll all go together?
To pull wild mountain thyme all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie, go?
I will range through the wilds, through the
deep glens sae dreary
And return wi loves spoils to the bosom of my dearie
Will ye go lassie go, and we'll all go together
Through the wild mountain thyme all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie, go.
I will build my love a bur, by yon clear crystal
fountain
Aye, and on it I will pile all the wild flo'ers o the mountain
Will ye go lassie go, and we'll all go together
To pull wild mountain thyme all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie, go?
If my true love she'll not come, then I'll surely
find another
To the wild mountain thyme, all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie go, and we'll all go together
To pull wild mountain thyme all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie, go?
To pull wild mountain thyme all around the blooming heather
Will ye go lassie, go?
[Applause.]
More, more!
17
Last one. Oh, there's still snow around, the fact that there's
snow on the ground. It's a beautiful hill Bennachie, I've
often thought of photographing it every morning right throughout
the year, you know at the same every morning and just see
the seasons changing. It's a super hill.
Oh do you see yon high hill all covered ower
wi snow,
They captured monies a true love and they'll soon part as
twa,
Busk busk bonnie lassie, aye and come awa wi me,
And I'll tak ye tae Glen Isla, ny bonnie Glenshee.
Oh do you see yon shepherd as he walks along,
With his sheep gathered roond him as they graze on,
Busk busk bonnie lassie, aye and come awa wi me,
And I'll tak ye tae Glen Isla, ny bonnie Glenshee.
Oh do you see yon soldier as he marched along,
Wi his plaidie ower his shoulder and his broadsword hanging
doon,
Busk busk bonnie lassie, aye and come awa wi me,
And I'll tak ye tae Glen Isla, ny bonnie Glenshee.
Oh do you see yon high hill all covered ower
wi snow,
They captured monies a true love and they'll soon part us
twa,
Busk busk bonnie lassie, aye and come awa wi me,
And I'll tak ye tae Glen Isla, near bonnie Glenshee.
Thank you. Goodnight.
[Applause.]
19
No they don't know any more. Time to draw the evening to a
close. Don't forget next Wednesday, I don't know why I'm doing
this, there's a meeting to discuss the forthcoming folk festival.
So come along if you want to participate in that, afterwards,
after the meeting which will be as short as I can possibly
make it, there'll be workshop sessions and sing arounds and
stuff like that, and a much more informal meeting. A month
from now, the first Wednesday next month is the next meeting,
so we'll see you all then. Goodnight.
And the 20th February, at the Tollbooth don't
forget that one. Third Sunday of the month.
Good night.
[Applause.]
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